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artsby littlemistress
Hey Girlies,
I don't really know whats appropriate to post here. It doesn't seem as journally as LJ or xanga so I suppose I'll just share something thats been on my mind instead of the traditional "This morning I had a piece of toast, then I brushed my teeth...."*stuff. (Mostly because I'm avoiding homework. Mid-terms! WHY!?)
It seems utterly unfair that as an artist that I don't have the audience and the potential to have my voice heard that musicians have. Music is so ineffably consumable and resonates deeply with pop culture and the masses. Its only inevitable that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE will hear you. Got a guitar? Got a myspace? Your set. Even better yet to play to an audience, to have people be moved by your sound, your words, your voice, to make you a god, to have that power and sway from a thing that you create.
(or maybe they picked me) two intensely private and personal medias. They require hours, if not days of seclusion, of intense personal reflection and contemplation in the preparation and creation of the work. However, when they are done, they are merely a record of the creation experiance. When I finish a painting, the absolute best I will ever do nowadays is a gallery showing, where other artists will clamour because their art is displayed as well or a buyer from the same haut-art circles. They do not speak to anyone outside of this small world. Even less displayed will be anything I write, once finished, buried among my papers and files because in a culture where poetry is too hard to understand if not set to a melody, my words will probably never be heard (lest I die tragically and young). If not reduced to tv, what can I be?
But then there is the problem of wanting to be heard. Do I truly want to be heard? By nature these things are intensely private. Would they be sullied if then popularly consumed? Would they mean less? Would I mean less? Theres always avenues of consumption for every art, especially on the internet, but still, you don't see the same idolatry. Why do I have this need to be heard and shun it at the same time? People like plants seeking towards the light and familiar, human compassion, even if we know logically that limelight is utterly ephemeral. I want to say I know my own name and don't need to speak it to others; but would that be the truth? Oh well, I think critique days in art-class just make me a bit angst-y. GAG. Sorry for the rant. Need to write my Lit. paper now! FIVE WHOLE PAGES! OH NOEZ! BTW, Whens the movie coming to DVD??? love, meg * (ten awesome points if you get the futurama reference)
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